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So sexual-massage, yeah? It’s like a massage, but spicy, innit. Them hands ain’t just kneadin’ ya back - they’re goin’ *places*, fam. Little-known fact - back in ancient times, them Chinese emperors was gettin’ these rubs to “balance their chi” or summat. Probs just an excuse to get freaky, haha! Makes me laff thinkin’ about some posh git in a robe tryna play it cool while he’s all oiled up.

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As the sun starts settlin’, I decide to head back home. I’m walkin’ down Lvivska Street, and I see this street performer. He’s playin’ the accordion, and it’s actually kinda good. I toss him a few coins, and he gives me a nod. I’m like, “Yeah, man, keep it up!”

These church parish centres in St Helens are taking aid donations for Ukraine